I took Chloe to the splash park today. She insisted on bringing her bike. I told her she couldn't ride it but I put it in the car anyway. I lifted up the little compartment in the back that she likes to put her treasures in. In it I found the sunblock and her magnetic dolls. She had put their bathing suits on.
And I laughed about that for a good while.

I am really proud of myself. I finally found a toy that Chloe loves. I bought her a princess dress- up for her birthday thinking she would want to wear it all the time. She wore it for 5 minutes at her birthday party and then told me she wanted to take it off. Kids. You never know. I guess the only princess dress she needs or wants is the purple velvet one with long sleeves. Although I start sweating just looking at her now.
Well I took that dress back and was in search of something she would really play with.
I know she likes magnets. I know she likes clothes.
And somehow I stumbled across this.
This toy is awesome.
She played with it for 3 hours straight.
It is like magnetic paper dolls.
I highly recommend it.
Anyway, I am starting early teaching Chloe the essentials of life.
ie. fashion is king. or queen. whatever.

It is hard to find in stores, but available tons of places online.
I found mine at Toys R' Us for 20 bucks.
And it was well worth every penny.
Search for it under "Melissa and Doug Magnetic Dress-Up."
If I could, I would get this for every little girl I know.
Or boy. If they are into that kind of thing.

Dear Uncle Sam,
Hello. I am contacting you, requesting your services. You see, Santa Clause and the Easter Bunny will be on vacation for awhile so I could not ask them. The only other person I can think of is you. I know this doesn't usually fall under your job description. Usually you just spread patriotic spirit and a go get em' attitude in times of war and such. Also you do an excellent job sporting striped pants. I gotta say, there are not too many men that can pull that off. Anyway, I was wondering if you could add gift giving to your list of responsibilities. I think that shoes are an excellent thing to give for the 4th of July. I realize of course that the 4th of July does not usually involve gift giving. But I would like to change that. I propose that we all get a new pair of shoes for the 4th of July. Why you ask? What does this have to do with America?
Well, I will tell you.
1. The Revolutionary War Patriots wore shoes.
2. George Washington wore shoes.
3. In every picture I see of the men who signed the Declaration of Independence they are wearing shoes.
4. You have to wear shoes when you go to vote.
5. "No Shirt-No Shoes-No Service" is part of the American Vernacular.
6. Do I really need to point out that the United States has two s's, and so does "shoes."
7. It is a very bad idea to play with sparklers without shoes, in case you have to run for your life. Or in case sparks land on your feet.
8. Abraham Lincoln also wore shoes.
9. You don't want to eat watermelon without shoes. There is nothing more annoying than sticky toes.
10. And finally, one should wear shoes walking around the bathroom at a public pool.

As you can see I offer a convincing argument.
You can send these shoes to me in the mail, just like I send my taxes to you in the mail.
They are Steve Madden, just in case you don't have time to get little elves together to make shoes in time for this 4th of July.
Yours Truly,
Melissa
Former Miss USA

Luggeez

Seriously-are using laundry baskets really that difficult that there was a need for this?

Also. The last thing I want to do right now is put on a long sleeve smock and go around my house picking stuff up.
My house is usually spotless anyway.

PS. Erin-can you send me your address? I think I am sending you this for your birthday.

For all of you who like my Chelsey stories....

So today I called Chelsey to check on her.
My Dad is working and so he likes me to call and check up on her periodically.
This was our conversation.

Me: Hi Chelsey
Chelsey: Hi
Me: How are you doing?
Chelsey: Uh...good.
Me: So have you eaten lunch? (It is 3:30 PM)
Chelsey: No.
Me: Why not? Aren't you starving?
Chelsey: Well yes. But there is nothing to eat.
Me: Well what about the hot pockets?
Chelsey: Uh...they are all gone. I think *Samantha and Jenny took them home.
Me: Are you sure? I saw them in the freezer last night. Go check.
Chelsey: Uh, okay.
5 minutes later

Chelsey: Sigh...Nope. They're not there.
Me: Well Chelsey you need to eat something. You must be starving. Did you eat breakfast? What did you have for breakfast?
Chelsey: A hot pocket.

*names of the girls who come over and work with her have been changed to protect their identity.

I take back my recommendation of the Skin Buffer pad thingee as mentioned previously.
While I still attest to it working on your stems,
You might be tempted to try it on other smaller, more delicate areas of your body, and to that I say,
STOP!
I don't know why I did it-but I tried it on my arm pit.
And holy cow.
I will be sleeping with gauze and neosporin.
I don't know why I thought rubbing sand paper on my delicate flesh was a good idea.


And now for my Chloe stories.
1. Chloe was taking a bath and she told me the large Barbie Ariel was the miniature Ariel's Mommy.
2. She calls all men dolls "Daddies." And I would like to keep it this way until she is 25.
Oh wait...that sounds a little creepy. Nevermind.
3. When I ask her, "How are you doing?" She says, "I doing!"
I think I already wrote this one down. But I am too lazy to go back and check, so it is staying.
and
4. Her favorite Birthday toy is a ballet Barbie. The Barbie came with a practically intangible water bottle. I saw her take the water bottle into the bathroom and then I heard her turn the water on. Apparently she was filling it up.
5. I pointed to McDonalds and asked Chloe what the name of the building is. She said, "hamburger house!"
Oh. And she is addicted to popsicles.

I can't believe these actually work.

I really couldn't believe this worked. I found it at the dollar store. I said, heck, why not try it! And it actually worked.
Then I got really excited and tried to get a certain someone to let me try it on their armpits.
Um...I would not try it on your armpits.
This certain someone was kind of mad at me.
Just like when they were mad at me when I spread Nair on their legs and they got a rash.
Or like the time I curled their hair and burned them like 12 times on Easter.