Feeling Sentimental

I can't really put my finger on it, but I have been feeling so sentimental lately about my kids growing up.  I want to freeze time.  I never want Chloe to stop doing all of her crafts, decorating my house for holidays, and her party planning, and coming up with hilarious conclusions in her attempts to make sense of the world ("Mom, I know why dinosaurs went extinct!  Because we needed a place to live! )

Or her thinking that I am her favorite person and most amazing person in the world, or her not worrying whether or not it is cool to show how excited you are about something little (like getting to take home your Easter Basket from school).

Or waking up in my bed after throwing up all night and saying sincerely, "Mom I need some liquid.  And something to eat. But nothing sweet like pancakes or french toast."

Or pronouncing and spelling words wrong.  

Or saying that she likes her hair curly, but not too fluffy.  And that she likes her pigtails "down."

Or having little fashion sense.

Or taking pictures of herself on my phone.

I never want Macie to stop insisting on wearing bathing suits and twirling around like a ballerina, or putting on her shoes backward first thing in the morning, or her raspy voiced babbling things I can't understand...but understanding a few very important things in her life: her yanna (balllerina barbie), her bowwle (bottle), shoes (she's got that word down), peepee (which actually means the other type), dand doo (thank you)....

Or her ALWAYS taking her dishes to the sink and dumping them in there on her tippy toes.

Or her grumpy faces, and funny faces, and silly smiles.

Or her wanting to be with me always.

(I could do without her putting her hand down my shirt while she drinks her milk though)

Or her wanting to do everything that her bigger sister does.

And her "helping" me do my laundry by throwing all the clothes she can in the washing machine.

Or her love for swings while also being terrified of going too high. 

Or that both of my girls love Primary and love to sing songs with all the sincerity and pureness of their hearts.

Every once in awhile I am reminded of how precious this time is with them, and I want to make sure that I savor every moment that they are mine, all mine.  

I read Chloe the part in the Book of Mormon after Jesus is resurrected and has come to America to show himself to the people here, and He gathers all the children, and blesses them individually, one by one.

I asked Chloe why He did that.  I can't remember what she said, but when I said, "Because he loves little children, and because they believe in Him without having to see Him," a big smile came across her face.

Thank goodness for children.  They are the salt of the earth.

Chelsey has a new obsession this week.  Some Nintendo system that I know nothing about.  She talks and talks...and then talks some more about needing money so she can buy it.
And she also wants to earn the money so she can buy it herself, because she wants to act like an adult.
So I swooped in with the idea that we could make a flier promoting her services. And she could give the flier out to people she knew, that way she could have more employers than just Dad.
Must to my astonishment she actually seemed excited by the idea.
So we began talking about what kind of services she could offer.
I suggested playing with children so that Moms can get some things done around the house.
She smiled.
Then I said, "How much do you think you want to charge for your services? Like how much would you charge to babysit some children for an hour?"
She thought about it for a minute before finally concluding, "I don't know.  A hundred dollars?"
I said, "hmmmm...well you might have to lower your fee."
She said, "Okay...50 dollars?"
I said, "Uh, still to high."
She said, "Fourty, thirty??"
I said, "Maybe more like 5."
She replied, "pfft. (sigh) okaaaay."

Chloe brought this paper home from church yesterday.  It says: "I tell the truth."  Or as Chloe sounds it out, "I tll the choof."  And that is exactly how she pronounces it.

 A couple weeks ago it hailed...and it was cold enough that it stuck around.  It happened twice in March.  I don't know if I have ever seen a storm like that in Mesa in all the years I have lived here.  Then again, I don't have a great memory, so don't quote me on that.  Two weeks ago we have "snow."  And last week it got to 90 degrees.  Why can't weather just find a happy medium?

And here is a picture of Macie so she doesn't feel left out.  I put her in trial swim lessons.  She hated it.  So instead of spending a lot of money to listen to her scream, she just goes with me to Chloe's swimming lessons and plays on the indoor play equipment.  In her bathing suit of course.  Because that's all she likes to wear.

Chloe decided to be "fancy" today.  Well even fancier than usual.

"Wait Mom. Let me find a pretty pose first."

My Least Favorite Things lyrics

Raindrops and cat claws on genuine leather.
Women with 10 kids who are light as a feather.
Wearing skinny jeans on Thanksgiving,
These are a few of my least favorite things.

Black Friday Shopping, Cashiers at Wal-Mart.
Husbands denying that it was their fault.
Silver white strands that I find in my hair.
These are the things that I simply can't bare.

Porto Potties and Fantasy football.
Stores putting candy at children's eye level.
Grown up birthdays that always are lame,
These are a few things that make me complain.

When the dog bites,
When the bee stings,
When I'm feeling coarse.
I simply remember my least favorite things,
And realize it could be worse.

Toddler tantrums in public places.
Disdain and horror on spectator's faces.
Photographs that cannot tell lies,
Oh my gosh, are those really my thighs?

Herding my children into the car.
Solving math problems without calculators.
Getting lost even with GPS,
These are the days that are not a success.

Photo radar and traffic school.
People who think marathons are cool.
Hand, foot, mouth disease, bed bugs, head lice.
These are the things I consider not nice.

When the Bishop calls,
When my shower's cold,
When I'm feeling mad.
I simply remember my least favorite things,
and think, hey it's not so bad.

Kim Kardashian and Kristen Stewert.
Opening the diaper pail at church.
Children with colds who lick their snot,
These are the things that I loveth not.

Cranky adults that hate my children.
Saddam Hussein and swimsuit season.
Brushing toddler's teeth, facebook bragging.
These are the things that frustrate me.

June, July, August, September.
Temperatures living things aren't meant to weather.
Downton Abby's season finale.
These are the things that bother me.

When the toilet breaks,
when the kids whine,
When I'm feeling cursed.
I simply remember my least favorite things,
And realize it could be worse.

A few of my least favorite things...

Last night I sang a song for our Relief Society Talent show.  Last year I did "When I Was Single Girl" (see below).  So this year I had to follow it up with something "funny."  Which was kind of a lot of pressure.  I mean, I didn't want to be a one hit wonder like Hansen Brothers, or LFO.  I butchered the Sound Of Music classic "My Favorite Things," turning it into "My Least Favorite Things."  Don said I could have written 10 more verses...which is probably true. This was not a compliment.  He meant I like to complain a lot.  Which...is probably true.  I will say if there is one thing that I improved on this year, it would be that I sat more lady like.  I don't know what is up with my saddle straddle from the year before.  It is truly cringe worthy.
I cringe a little in this one too, like when I messed up the words, By the way it is supposed to be "these are the days that are not a success."  I feel much better.



Speaking of complaining...
It is Spring Break this week, which means the weather decided to skip Spring and go straight to Summer.  It was 90 degrees yesterday, as was the day before.  I mention this because for some reason I thought it was a good idea to get the kids outside to enjoy the "spring" weather.  But in reality, I just had to listen to A LOT of whining and complaining about how hot it was. I don't know where they get that from, certainly no one around here complains about anything.
Anyway, let me tell you a story:
Yesterday I took the kids to some free festival in downtown Mesa.  I should have known better.  I usually steer clear of free community events because it usually means there will be way too many people to actually see or enjoy anything.  And I was right.  On top of that, did I mention yet that it was hot?  Well my friend and I walked through the festival and then decided to just walk over to a nearby sandwich shop to eat because neither of us were thinking ahead enough to bring cash, and the ATM had a fee.  I mean, why would we need money, it was a "free" festival right?  Well you know how that goes.  It is free, but listening to your children boo and moan over wanting a snow cone and kettle corn will cost you upwards of your sanity.
Anyway, we ate at said sandwich shop, and Macie napped in her stroller.
And then she woke up, and he** was released.
Macie sometimes wakes up ballistic from naps.  Well naps in which she slept in a hot stroller, for not enough time.
She remained banshee-esque for at least a half hour.
Nothing would get her to stop.  We are in this stage right now.  I have no idea what to do when she starts having her possessed tantrums in public places.
She finally stopped being fully possessed and downgraded to full on grumpy as we stood under a tree to watch the free Dinosaur Puppet Show.  (I decided I had to do something at the festival.  I mean I drove all that way and packed my double stroller in the car, which takes some major internal pep talks, so I had better make it worth it.)
I knew this was a bad idea to stick around and wait for the show.  Knew. It.  Macie could go full on crazy at any moment.  She was a ticking time bomb.  And just as the show started, BOOM! Macie went off!  All because of the stupid, blasted snowcones she saw in everyone elses hands.  Would she settle for water? No! Would she settle for a cookie? Of course not! She wanted a. flipping. snow. cone.

As Macie is throwing her body around and screaming at the top of her lungs, I have no other choice but to leave the puppet show, which was actually looking to be really cool.  These weren't dopey hand puppets, they looked like actual dinosaurs.

I thought to myself, well I could just try to leave, but then I will be dealing with Chloe too.  And she was enjoying the show. So I told Chloe to just sit there and watch the show and I would be right back.

So I walked over to the ATM and thought, I will just bite the bullet and pay the fee, get a dumb snowcone, and then go back to the show.

But I couldn't do it.  The fee was $3.50. I was not going to pay the price of a snowcone in fees, just to get a snowcone.  Especially when I looked at the snowcone line and it was about 3 hours long.
Meanwhile Macie has steam blowing out of her ears and drool coming out of her mouth.
And she has planted herself on the asphalt in yoga resting position, so hoarse that she can hardly scream, but believe me, she is trying her best at it.
And along comes a woman who says to me in a very concerned voice, "Is she okay?"
And I say, "uh...ya, she's just having a tantrum."
And she says, "What's wrong with her?"
 (Melissa thinks, Uh good question!!! Wouldn't I like to know! Because I am really enjoying it!)
Melissa actually says, "I don't know.  She's just having a tantrum."
And woman says, "Is she burning herself? That asphalt is hot."
(Melissa thinks, thank you for all of your helpful observations.  I intentionally put my child on the asphalt to punish her. And I told her to stick her face in it too.)
Woman says, "Where is her shoe? Her foot must be hot. That must be what it is, her foot is hot."
(Melissa thinks, oh ya, that's what it is, she is throwing herself on the asphalt because her foot is hot! Why didn't I think of that!)
Melissa says, "ya, she lost it because she is having a tantrum."
Woman sees shoe one foot away from me, picks it up and says to me, "There, that will fix it."
(Uh huh. Yep.  That'll fix it. She is having this tantrum because she lost her shoe.)
She continued to hover for a few more moments before finally leaving to get some kettle corn.  But she made sure to keep looking back at us.

By this time, I am ready to just leave the children and yell to anyone wanting to listen, "Peace out y'all!"
Of course, I didn't do that.
Finally I was able to force Macie over to a nearby fountain where she stuck her feet in, and eventually returned back to her normal self.
We made it back over to the Dinosaur show for the last five minutes, and upon our return, I was greeted by a sobbing Chloe who had thought I had abandoned her.
All in all, it was a really fantastic outing. Not.
I hope that lady was watching and followed me to my car so she could get my license plate and turn me into CPS.
But I will tell them the only crime I saw was an ATM charging $3.50 and a snowcone line that lasted 3 hours.
Peace out.

chloe  told me that her cousin didn't like the name of her school. I asked her what she told him was the name of her school .
she said, "booger teeth Washington."
aka booker t. Washington .
I personally think booger teeth Washington has  a nice ring to it.