Chloe told me yesterday:
"Mommy. Baby sista not have any eyebrows.
We glue some on?"

So we did.
Just kidding.

Macie comes to earth.

Macie Leigh Mortensen arrived Saturday February 5th, 2011 at 7:44 PM. Weighing in at 7 pounds 11 ounces. 37 weeks and 2 days gestation and 2 weeks prior to my scheduled inducement.

My joy is immense and I just want to cuddle and stare at her all day. Unfortunately I have to take baths with an inflateable donut sometimes so I am not totally free to do that.

More details later...but it was an amazing experience and better than any Super Bowl in the history of super bowls. Although I wouldn't know much about that cause I don't really care about the Super Bowl. But seriously, it had all the makings of a historic game: surprise, waiting, pain, exhileration, drama, down and out, losing in sight, faith, team work, encouragement, screaming, cheering, and then pulling out the win in the end....

I can't wait to tell you all about it.

I am going to go stare at Macie now.

Yesterday Chloe was being less than delightful during my piano lessons.

So Don put her in her room.

Next thing I know I hear the most pathetic poetry reading of "Twinkle, Twinkle."

From the back room I hear Chloe giving her mournful speech:
"Twinkle Twinkle Wittle Staw.
How I wonda whad you awe..."

And so on....

I couldn't stop laughing.
I asked Don what in the world she was doing that for.
He told me he told her she could come out of her room when she was happy and that he wanted her to sing "Twinkle, Twinkle."

I guess she couldn't bring herself to sing it, so she just spoke it.

14 days...14 days...14 days...I can do it...I can do it...I can do it...I can...do...i.....

Melissa Get's In Trouble.

So yesterday I went to my Doctor.

And while I was waiting in my little room, I decided I would take my shot. Which by the way, was really late in the day to be taking my shot. Bad Melissa.
But if you had to give yourself shots twice a day you would procrastinate too wouldn't you? They are so tedious. In case you don't know why I take shots, it is because I had a blood clot in my leg a few years back so I have to take blood thinner while pregnant. But only while pregnant, thank goodness!

Anyway, so I was taking my shot, and I was almost done and the Medical Assistant knocked and I said come in. It wasn't on purpose, but I quickly put my shot stuff away, and it looked like a just threw it on the floor, when really I was landing it in my purse. I guess I looked suspicious. So she comes in and sort of flips out.

She thought I was shooting up.

I quickly explained, but she was still weird.

Then I heard her outside say, "Ya well I came in and she was dropping everything on the floor."

I thought, could we please not announce this to the entire back office staff?

So then my Doctor came in and said, "So I guess Jennifer thought you were shooting up." And he kind of laughed.

And then I had to explain why I was taking my shot so late in the day and how I have been a very bad girl in getting my blood checked.

And then I had the Strep B test.

And I said, well 3 uncomfortable awkward situations are about all I can handle in one day, and I went home.

I don't think I have ever been suspected of being a drug user.
And I hope it never happens again.

The end.

Christmas. Once and For All.

I hate technology. I spent forever trying to do this dumb post and then it got erased. And now I can't figure out how to turn the underline off. I think I am going to take a break or I might

Well I am back. As you can see I took a break. And the underline magically disappeared. I was having real technological difficulties yesterday. Everything seems to be broken around here. Phones, car, cameras, lap tops....

I have been meaning to catch up on Christmas and almost gave up because I could not get my Christmas pictures off my broken camera, but alas, happy day, I got them off the broken lap top. As you can see by these pictures, they are high quality. I got lazy Christmas morning and only took a few pictures. Goal: get a new camera before baby comes. Because the one I have chaps my hide.

So here are some pictures of Christmas morning. I can barely remember Christmas. I mean it was a month ago. I can barely remember what happened yesterday.

I do remember we ate breakfast first. Don made his famous chorizo and egg burritos and this year we did things a little differently and had crepes. Stuffed crepes are my all time favorite breakfast food.
Then we opened presents. which I can also barely remember. Chloe handed out presents at lightning speed and opened a lot of presents that were not her own. I think I already talked about her ballet shoes in a previous post...and she got a pink ballerina skirt, the other thing she asked for.

Her big gift was a doll house. And I wrapped all the furniture separately to give her more things to open. She seemed pleased with her doll house. I was hoping it would be a self playing type of toy. But as it turns out when she wants to play with it, it usually involves some poor soul who ends up having to tell some endless story about witches, snow white, bony legs, cars, and whatever strange figurines happen to be lying around. Last night I was putting her to bed and telling her a story, and you know what, I fell asleep in the middle of it, but I was still talking, because when I woke up, Chloe said, "Thas a good story Mom." And then I thought to myself, what was I even saying? And I honestly could not remember.

Chelsey got a Wii. And when I say "wii" it is definitely not a "we" toy. It is an "I" toy. Good luck getting her to let you play. It is like negotiating with the Russians during the Cold War. My Dad let the cat out of the bag before she opened it. He was telling us how he had to even all the gifts out because he got Chelsey a Wii. And that is how Chelsey found out she was getting a Wii.
And I really raked in the goods this Christmas. Chelsey gave me my very own VHS copy of "It Takes Two." I found out later she had 2 copies. I was happy to take one off her hands. I love the Olsen twins. They are terrific actresses.

After presents we watched a documentary about the Disney resurgence in the 1990's. Which was very Christmas-ish. Okay it wasn't but it was interesting. And then we took naps. And then later we went to my Dad's house and played the card version of Monopoly, which I actually like, and then the insane ones stayed up until after Christmas to finish Settlers of Cataan. So Christmas was nice, and I was a little sad it was over, but this year my Christmas is coming in February. And this gift is going to be just a little bit better than my very own copy of "It Takes Two."

PS Funny Chloe quotes as of late:
I heard her make believing with her Snow White and Alice figurines and I heard Snow White say, "Ya, my Kings a good Kisser."

My Dad asked where Don was, and he had gone to the bank.
Chloe responded, "Uh....He went to the piggy bank."

Things I need:
1. Someone who can lift more than 20 pounds. (Don and I are both out of the running. Me, for obvious reasons, and Don because of his hernia thing)
2. Lots of money.

And then I would able to turn my spare room into a nursery/guest room.
Oh well.
I'll just move some crap off some shelf or something to make room for some diapers and call it good.
Sigh.
Second children sure do have a different life experience don't they.
But I was 3rd, And I turned out splendidly.
So I'm not worried.
Just wish I didn't have so many eye sores in my house.